Return

Kabukichō, Tokyo. April 12, 2019. Photo by Jason Vong.

Hey. It’s me. I’m back.

A lot’s happened since I’ve been here. After meeting Markiplier back in San Diego Comic-Con 2016, I’ve been up to some traveling, some new hobbies, and maybe some new photographic techniques. But something’s amiss. Presently, time just feels like it’s moving all around me while I’m stuck in the middle of the street, watching everyone pass me in fast forward. Kind of sounds like a song. My friend and fellow photographer Jason Vong (to whom the credit goes to for the photo of me in this post) perfectly visualized this for me, and it’s hit harder this week for me than it ever has.

And I personally think it’s for rather silly reasons.

All Curry House restaurants closed this past Monday. Mikkeller DTLA also shuttered the same day. Kobe & Gigi’s memorial at the Staples Center reopened some of the wounds of loss and grief I’ve nursed over the years. A handful of things I used to do on a daily, sometimes weekly basis no longer interest me. I struggle to give proper credit where it’s due in times where I have the spotlight on me and the opportunity to share my successes with those who have helped me get to where I am today.

This weird wave of lows hit me pretty hard this week. And I think most of this is silly because I’ve grown attached to these establishments; places of business that shouldn’t be creating any sense of attachment to their offerings. But as I look into it more, it’s not so much the establishments themselves as it is the environments in which they fostered human connections I’ve made and shared. Food and booze come and go, and so do people, but it’s the talks and topics shared in these places that live on.

I’m barely even a basketball fan, but I’ve grown to watch Laker games with my dad from the earliest I can remember as a kid to the occasional Buffalo Wild Wings visits I’ve made with college friends to see them win championships. I’ve attended several concerts and events, and I return to Anime Expo every year in the L.A. Live area where Staples Center also is.

And you know what? That’s it. That’s what I’ve just now discovered as I write this. It’s the attachment to this city and these seemingly abrupt changes that have shaken me to my core. A lot of my time spent here as a resident of downtown Los Angeles has been accumulating fond memories that I’ll always remember and keep close to the heart. So when the times change, I become distraught as if pieces of me have also been lost to the marching of time. But I suppose that’s part of the stages of grief. I think I finally figured out how to accept everything that’s been happening and continue marching with my head up instead of down and behind me.

I imagine I was looking up at that moment in Kabukicho in Tokyo not even thinking about when I’d be flying back home. That moment was mine, I thought it was going to last forever, and I was sharing it with some of the best company I’ve ever had. That specific moment with that specific group of people may or may not happen again, but I’ll always have that moment through a photo to remember it by. And through photos and memories of places and people, I can hope to not only remember them but also create new memories in tribute or inspiration to these past moments.

And that’s what I and so many others will likely do after coming to accept Kobe’s passing and all of those lives on-board he was traveling with. We continue to remember and pay our respects by simply living on. We hope to live and continue creating memories in honor of those we’ve lost in our own lives. In a sense, it seems unfair, and that’s where I can potentially become distraught again. Why did s/he have to leave us when s/he had so much more to give in this life? Why am I so hopelessly attached to a city that probably could care less about me once I leave it?

Our lives are ours to make of it. Grief and loss are normal parts of life. Accepting and paying homage to what we’ve lost by living the best we can is simply all we can do. After re-analyzing much of what I’ve been up to since I was last here, I realize that the only thing I truly have to lose is not continuing to enjoy and take advantage of the life we still have. Suddenly, life doesn’t feel like it’s moving in fast forward in now. Slowly and surely, it’s as if I can make out everyone around me again, and I can finally start moving forward again, chin up and optimistic for the new opportunities I wouldn’t be spotting if I kept looking down at my feet.

In Memoriam – Laura Fontanilla / AnoHana’s Menma and Her Letters

Cosplay by Larry Bear. Character: Meiko “Menma” Honma. Series: あの日見た花の名前を僕達はまだ知らない (We Still Don’t Know the Name of the Flower We Saw That Day.)

Cosplay and tributes work well together when the context of the show relates so closely to what you are paying tribute to. AnoHana for short, this show touches upon the life of a group of friends who lost one of their own early on in their childhood. Inner thoughts and emotional dissections ensue, and we have a rather satisfying ending. Inspired by a true story? Possibly. Laura was a good friend for many years. And though we lost touch for nearly six of them, we were able to reconnect for two more before her untimely passing. This is an open letter about my thoughts on her young legacy from my viewpoint. May she find peace and comfort in knowing that she was loved and will always be remembered.

Hello Kitty Hungry Hunt @ Zip Sushi & Izakaya [10.31.14]

Hello Kitty Hungry Hunt partnered up with several restaurants in and around downtown Los Angeles to bring exclusive, themed meals and limited edition pins from each establishment. Here is Zip Izakaya’s contribution to the Hunt! Photos after the break…

CicLAvia | Heart of LA – Little Tokyo Vantage Point (2nd and Central); Cyclists Take Over Downtown

I was wondering why there weren’t any cars passing by on the streets of Little Tokyo this morning.

Metro’s CicLAvia | Heart of LA event is happening today from 9am to 4pm. This photo was taken around 11 this morning. The path, which can be viewed here, takes cyclists, skaters, and rollerbladers east-west from Echo Park to East Los Angeles Civic Center, and north-south from Chinatown to the Theater District. Based on my personal experience from attending this event only a few years ago, several Los Angeles streets are closed off from automobile and public transit access for a few hours for people to enjoy historic areas of downtown and surrounding districts. It’s fun whether hot or not, and today’s 90-degree weather just means riders need to protect themselves from the sun and hydrate more. Also, there are a variety of interesting musical pieces being played from some cyclists’ stereo systems for all to hear, ranging from 80s funk (Let it Whip sound familiar?) to today’s most interesting dubstep. Just now, I heard a drumline and looked out my window to find that there was a small band of five drummers on a wooden platform being hauled across the street.

I didn’t attend today’s festivities despite living here in downtown, mostly because I reserved this day to take care of much needed errands. However, Metro is indeed having one more even later in the year that I might attend if I get myself a road bike by then. I’ve always wanted to attend one of these events in full gear (no pun intended). If not South LA, then there would be no doubt Metro would return CicLAvia to the heart of downtown once more while I still live here.

Motivation, Levitation, Persistence, Expectation

You know that saying where you need to fall so many times before you can be successful? What if you could just levitate in the air after you get back up and never fall back down?

When I was in Vancouver back in August, I was fortunate to meet many new faces, make new friends, and have lots of fun. I was also inspired a lot. Take this photo for instance and it actually has an outwardly obvious point of inspiration; the other is something only those that were there with me would understand, which is what I’d like to reveal to you here in this post.

Outwardly, this photo is inspired by none other than Natsumi Hayashi of yowayowa camera woman diary. I’ve always wanted to try what Natsumi-san does with her photos, and I’m glad I was able to have some assistance this time around in doing so. The other point of inspiration is Linda from LindaDProductions (be sure to check out her YouTube channel as well) who was behind the camera to take this image. Thanks, Linda! I’m actually honored to have gotten to know her through the group of people I was with in a casual way. I can’t imagine how I would have reacted if I was a huge fan; speechless and stutter-y all the time, I’m sure.

Having either heard or met these individuals is something really cool and, for the most part, rare to me. They both have amazing talent, have outlets to share their creativity and passion, and do it consistently and persistently. I feel like I’ve been there, but have fallen. Again and again. Recent changes to my lifestyle have helped me get back up and get some more hang time each time around. And now here I am, filled with inspiration to continue setting a new set of expectations for what I want to evolve my skill into next.

Thanks again, everyone. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to try and kiss the sky some more.

New Layout! Giant Robots! Big(ger) Photos!

Hot off the heels of my excitement for this summer anime season’s lineup is a brand new show featuring mecha, a ragtag team of civilian high school students showing their tactical superiority in dire situations that military personnel just can’t measure up to, and a brand new site layout for a blog that was begging to be redone since maybe two years ago. Why the change, you ask? Well, for starters, dynamic layouts (sites that change layouts depending on the device or browser window size viewed on) were just starting to gain functionality and popularity when I started this blog. Secondly, I’ve been wanting to get back into writing again, specifically about the summer 2014 anime season, and what better way to kick-start new content than to refresh the interface?

There are a handful of items that need to be scrubbed and re-arranged, like streamlining what’s in the the sidebar (which is still on the left side), choosing proper background photos for each page, and updating the size of photos in blog posts that link to my flickr profile. Truth be told, this interface is actually geared toward restaurants (hey, maybe I can post a price sheet PDF for my photography services!), but the WordPress demo impressed me with the ability to create static child/parent pages with unique, featured photo backgrounds that, once again, scale to the size of a browser window or mobile device screen resolution. The more customized child/parent page functionality is important for my content as this will allow me to partition my entire WordPress profile into a landing page that leads visitors to either my anime blog or my photography portfolio, which was the original intent of this site to begin with.

So, there is no doubt that this is a work-in-progress, but I think I’m going to have a lot of fun revamping everything. Like the high school characters in the promo poster for Aldnoah.Zero above, I can’t wait to get my hands and knees dirty to bring this site back to having consistent content! To the newcomers and even those that still visit my site, thanks for stopping by, sticking around, and checking out my posts! More photos, anime reviews, and random shenanigans to come!

Korilakkuma Is My New Boss

I think it’s time I changed the layout of this site to kick-start the uploading of some new content. Korilakkuma agrees as she patiently sits and watches me work from the living room.

Putting the Media in Pacific Media Expo: An Unofficial Vocaloid Concert

40 days of fundraising and almost $4,000 USD later, we have a Vocaloid concert! And no, this isn’t Crypton Future Media, SEGA, 5bp, MARZA ANIMATION PLANET INC., or any other entity or production studio typically associated with Vocaloid concerts that put this show together. With enough continued momentum, Synthesized Reality Productions could very well be the go-to production studio for local Vocaloid concerts until it gains traction with the likes of larger conventions such as Anime Expo. Anyone who is a Vocaloid fan who knew about and/or was fortunate to attend the 2011 Mikunopolis event in Los Angeles would probably agree that seeing more of Miku, Luka, Rin and Len onstage here in the United States is something we really need to see more often, especially for the efforts put forth at this year’s Pacific Media Expo. Read on for my quick impression of the show and some photos of the concert.

Thoughts

“There is so much I want to do. I’m brimming with thoughts of things I want to create… I chase after every image that flies out. I catch them, battle them, and consume them after sampling each flavor. I name and return them to where they ought to be [over and over]. It requires so much time.

I want to open all these boxes, but a mortal life span is too short to do such a thing. A single lifetime limits how many boxes you can open.”

A Melancholic Forty Days; Cake

Prayers help to spread love and peace across the planes of life and death. After forty days of a passing of an individual, he or she is finally able to ascend from any pain and suffering felt up to and through his or her passing. So why the gathering only now? Well, for some, power in numbers always helps in these difficult times. Whether one is Catholic or religious to any degree, coping helps when you have the strength of those close to you to carry the burden of loss. On the 31st of August of this year, we celebrated the fortieth day of my sister Johannah’s passing with friends and family, through song and prayer, and through laughter and love.